The main difference is the approach that we use in our role as a coach. Sex therapists provide more traditional “talk therapy” which definitely has its place. But sex and intimacy happens in and between bodies, not in your head. In fact, being in your head is one of the reasons that you disconnect from your sexuality or your partner.
When things aren’t working in our sexual relationships, we need to find new ways to act, communicate and connect. Often we need to learn new skills such as slowing things down, different types of touch, how to escalate an intimate encounter, asking for what you want. These skills can best be learned in an
experiential interactive manner. You wouldn’t teach someone how to drive a car without actually giving them real life road experience. So how can you expect to learn new sex and intimacy skills without practicing them and getting real time feedback?
Another crucial difference is how we show up. Most therapists hold boundaries around their own vulnerability with clients. we view each client as an opportunity to create a new intimate relationship where we can both be open and vulnerable and practice relationship skills with each other.
Each session is unique and geared towards the specific issue that we are working with or what you walk in with that day. Sessions typically involve a combination of embodiment practices, an interactive, experiential component and some talking and processing.
Sometimes you will learn a new skill and have the opportunity to practice it with me and get immediate and honest feedback.
We have a very large toolbox and will draw upon exercises and practices from many different areas and modalities based on your unique needs.
We do not offer single or one off sessions, except for the initial consultation to assure that we are both comfortable working together. Most of our clients see us between 2-4 times per month for a minimum of six months.
After working with hundreds of clients we know how important it is to first lay the groundwork, establish comfort and safety, and master the building blocks of sexual embodiment before taking a deep dive into sexuality and intimacy.
Tantra is an esoteric spiritual path that takes years to master. In the West, many Tantra teachers and workshops do not teach the full path, instead, they teach a small segment that focuses on sexuality, massage, and breathing. While we incorporate some Tantric ideas and methods into our teachings, such as experiencing the world through all of your senses, we do not believe that any kind of sexual expression is the best and don’t insist that you adopt a new language or complicated types of breathing. Instead, we invite you to celebrate your sexuality as an expression of your personal freedom. We will support you in exploring your sexuality the way that you want to without judgment, and we will encourage you to find your own places of comfort, joy and expansion.
There are many people out there calling themselves life coaches and some of them are quite good, especially if you already have a good idea of what you want to do. Unfortunately, most people begin pursuing a path before really getting in touch with their deepest and most important desires. Our coaching begins by connecting you with your body, your sexuality and helping you tap into your heartfelt desires, desires that may have been ridiculed or that you may have denied yourself in the past. Because we begin with desire and pleasure instead of jumping right into goals, our coaching will help you experience the most pleasurable life you can, and help you expand your ideas of what is possible for you. Additionally, very few coaches are trained to deal with sexuality and often have intimacy and vulnerability issues themselves. We are comfortable in intimacy and experienced in developing the trust, boundaries and communication this work requires. The coaching we offer can help you transform every aspect of your life, from your sexual connection and relationship to your personal and professional life.
While it is true that some types of sexual difficulties can be rooted in physiological problems such as hormonal imbalances or limited blood flow, many of them also have a mental component or can be overcome through getting more in touch with the body. Medical doctors will often jump immediately to prescription drugs because they are not aware of alternative approaches. Often erectile problems can be overcome by lowering anxiety, tuning into sensation and releasing shame and other emotional blocks. We have had a great deal of success helping clients to get and maintain erections without medication.
We also believe in the power of alternative approaches to health, particularly in their focus on holistic solutions that take account of every part of your being. Practices such as yoga and meditation can deeply enhance your life, yet they may never touch on your sexual or erotic life. Thus, we work in conjunction with your practices to support you in expanding sexual and sensual pleasure in your daily lives and increased intimacy in your relationships. We teach you how to experience more joy and comfort in your body and learn to fully give, receive, and relax into pleasure because we know that nurturing your life force is the best preventative medicine there is!
Consciousness is the state or quality of awareness, or, of being aware of an external object or something within oneself.
To be in any positive, healthy and growthful relationship, you have to start with self consciousness. “Know Thyself”.
Your longest running personal and sexual relationship has been with yourself. If you can’t get that one right, you’re unlikely to get any other right.
We assist you in becoming more self aware through intimate conversation, embodiment practices, mirroring for introspection and loving reflection.